Tag Archive | i need love

“I’m a loser because my peer said so.”

Sep30

The influence of peers is astonishing.  If a girl or guy peer calls you ugly, you’re ugly.  If they call you a nobody, you’re a nobody.  If they label you as outcast, you’re an outcast.  If you’re reading this and you let what people say define who you are, listen to me closely!

“So God created mankind in his own image,
   in the image of God he created them;
   male and female he created them.”  -Genesis Chapter 1 verse 27.

You were not created in the image of the people who abuse and verbally asault you. You were created in the image of a good and loving God. You have a mind, a heart, the beautiful capacity to love (even if you’re unsure how to express it), there is no one on the planet with your fingerprint. You’re unique and special in every way. You’re loved, whether you feel it or not. Remember, love is not a feeling, it is an action and commitment that, when shown, can produce a feeling in response to it. If you have not felt loved, it does not mean you aren’t. I love you, although I’ve never seen you. You may be able to feel it through the blogs I write and you may not. I’m invisible to you: although you see my picture, you have never seen me physically in person. It’s the same with God. You may not have seen Him physically, but He is there, looking at you through the eyes of love. And who is above Him? Who can judge what He created and say they are this or that? The wonderful thing about God, is He understands every pain you go through. He’s endured the worst name calling and slander since the very beginning. He is an unfortunate pro at being bullied. But He doesn’t listen to them. His eyes are watching the low in spirit, the crushed, the hurt, the poor, the abused, the outcast. His eyes are on you.

Cry out to Him when that bully flings a defaming remark to you. Pray for that person too. Jesus said, “ “But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you.  Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also.  Give to anyone who asks; and when things are taken away from you, don’t try to get them back.  Do to others as you would like them to do to you.” 

 ”If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat;
   if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. 
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head,
   and the LORD will reward you.”

You know once, I was on the phone while driving. To be honest, I don’t what I did wrong, maybe cut someone off accidentally? but this man followed me to a red light, parked, got out the car, came up to my window and said, “Don’t talk on the ****ing phone while driving! Learn how to ****ing drive!” I rolled down my window and said, “God bless you.” He stuttered over his words and said, “God bless you too!” In a softer tone. It’s amazing what can happen to a person’s heart when they see instead of personalizing their words and believing them, you pity them and show them kindness in return. Pray for strength to endure. Bullies will be bullies. Maybe they’ll change, maybe they won’t, but you can change the way you respond to their lies.

You’re worth more than you will ever comprehend. I pray you come to know your incaluable value in my eyes, and more importantly in the sight of a God who has always loved you.

The LORD appeared to us in the past,saying:

   “I have loved you with an everlasting love;
   I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.  I will build you up again.”-Jeremiah 31:3

I’m here for you,

                                Natasha

Ladies: Enough is Enough!

Aug31

An older, but still relevant post. Girls, get it together and know your worth! Stop settling for less, when God has the best waiting for you.

 

The other day I was in the restaurant (Houston’s where I used to work) and there were two young women there, maybe twenty-five at most, standing by the bar.  They were dressed provocatively and an older man, maybe fifty-five or so was at the bar, flirting with them.  He was rubbing his hand on one of their backs and a few minutes later when I looked again [they were standing at the bar stools right by the front desk], he had his hand on the other girl’s butt.  Later on, I saw them at a table with another older man.

Admittedly, I’ve seen this several times being that I work at a high-end restaurant and it never fails to sadden me.  Here these young ladies are, beautiful on the outside, yes, but of so much more value and worth than what they’re putting out there on display for the world to see.  They’re not many years older than me, yet why are they with these old horn-dogs and not a handsome young prince?  Do they not care for one?  Or have they, somewhere along the way, been so bruised by toads, they just gave up on finding a prince?  What if someone told them the way God sees them?  What if someone could give them a small taste of the amazing plans God planned for them before they were even born?  Would it change the course of their life?

If you’re reading this and you are one of those young ladies, maybe you’re not dating old horn-dogs, but you’ve definitly been settling for the wrong guys or selling yourself short and going as low as flat out losers, or even guys that just think they’re somebody and treat you like a rap-star groupie.  If that’s you, please listen to this.

Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. He chose to give birth to us by giving us his true word. And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession.-Jame 1:17-18

For thus says the LORD of hosts: “He sent Me after glory, to the nations which plunder you; for he who touches you touches the apple of His eye. -Zechariah 2:8

I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well.-Psalm 139:14

Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure.-Ephesians 1:4-5

Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are?-Matthew 6:26

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that in due time He may exalt you. Cast the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns] once and for all on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully.-1 Peter 5:6-7

For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.-Jeremiah 29:11

There’s too many verses to put in this blog that describe the great value God sees in you, the depth of His rich love toward you, the awesome plans and promises He holds out for you as a gift.  We get so caught up sometimes.  This world is overflowing with lies.  The media saturates our mind, clouding our vision, distracting us from truth.  It tells men to degrade us, to use and abuse us, and tells us women to take the abuse and like it.  We have walked so far away from the original plan of God for our lives that depression is at its peak.  But the wonderful thing about this time is it’s the season for grace.  As long as you are alive, you have a chance to change the course of your life.  You don’t have to accept the abuse anymore.  You don’t have to settle another day.  You can discover your worth, you can discover true love.  God is waiting for us all to run into the shelter of His open arms.

Girl I’m talking to, He yearns to call you Daughter.

He desires to make you royalty.

You were made to be a princess.

You were made to be loved.  Don’t settle for less.

May you run to the arms that long to cradle you, to protect you, to care for you.

You’re a lovely temple.

You’re a work of art, created by the Master Artist of the entire universe.

Be beautiful, be joy-filled, be changed, be saved, be forgiven, be renewed, be loved.

Blast from the Past

Aug27

If you’re a serial dater like I once was, you may have a knack for re-dating an ex.  My expert advice on the subject:  DON’T DO IT!

First of all, if it didn’t work out before, what makes you think it’ll work out now?  Too many of us are hooked, snatched, stuck, whatever you want to call it, on an ex boyfriend.  I know a girl who went out with the same guy SEVEN TIMES!  And she still “felt bad” for him!  I know she’s not alone on this so if you’re on round three, four, or even just two with the same guy, step into my office.

THE EX RECAP

Recycle woman, I want to ask you to please recap what happened the first time that caused you two to break up.  Now, be honest with yourself, is there a chance that it can happen again?

“Once a cheater, always a cheater.”  Oh how true.  The only thing that can stop a horn-dog in his tracks is a Divine Trainer!  If he hasn’t encountered Him, RUN AWAY without thinking twice!

Maybe it wasn’t cheating, maybe it was too much fighting.  Okay: yes, IF the guy is well-intended and truly cares for you, there is a remedy for this (see “Why men love b****es.” Why this is a lie.”).  HOWEVER, if the fighting has anything to do with some major character flaws on his behalf e.g. lying, cheating, verbal abusing, physical abusing, control issues, jealously issues, DO NOT EVEN TRY WITH THE GUY!  Cut him off!

THE WORLD SHIFT

If you’re thinking about giving an ex another go, chances are you had made him the sun of your universe or have an insecurity issue.  BOTH need changing.

If he was your sun, meaning everything revolved around him, your disposition depended on him etc., stay single.  Don’t give him OR another guy a try.  You have to set your priorities straight.  A guy can never be the epicenter of your world.  He can be a nice addition to your world, but not the object of it.

Who is most important in your life?

The ideal answer to this question is God, then ourselves and then others.  But I know for some of us it’s, “John, Alex, Brian, Juan,” or whoever the dude is, with ourselves last.  For me, I somehow tricked myself into thinking God was important, that since I prayed every day to Him, I loved Him.  But really, my ex Dace was way before God, and I loved him more.  Most of the time when I went to God, it was about Dace!  Sure I’d somewhat pray for my family, but really, the bulk of my prayers had selfish motives.  A few times in our relationship I saw the intervention of God, the gentle knocking on my heart, trying to get my attention.  Heck, I even said aloud once after Dace and I broke up the first time, “God, I think you’re trying to tell me to put You first.” Literally seconds after I said that, Dace told me he wanted to try again. But of course, after we started going out again, God was shoved to the back of the line with only a five-minute, “Hello, can you do this for me?” nightly phone call.  It wasn’t until He intervened two more times that I truly decided to try to get to know Him, to pursue Him like I had so passionately pursued my ex. When I did, He swept me off my feet. Dace was no longer the center of my universe, God was. Funny, after I made that decision, the guy I could only dream about came marching along without me seeking him.

So once you let God show you what He’s got, it’s super easy to fall in love with Him and make Him first place in your life, but loving yourself next–after all the abuse and pain of past relationships–can be a bit more tricky.

A simple remedy: start seeing what God thinks of you. Yes, the Bible is ancient, but when you actually delve into it, you see how relative it is to the here and now.  You discover the value you have as a special creation of God (think about it: God made man first and was like, “Wow, there is obviously something missing here,” and after making YOU, He was completely satisfied with the work of His hands).

God sees you as that necessary missing piece of the world.  When you see all He entrusts you with–the responsibilities and how He commands men to treat you and what He has to say to the man who marries you–you basically feel like Daddy’s little princess that better be treated the way He would treat you or else!

Once you’ve learned to love God and yourself, MAYBE one day things will work out with your ex.  But in most cases, there’s a prince out there waiting to step into your path and rescue you from all the terrible dragons of your past and that guy is definitly worth waiting for.